When we talk about kindergarten, a lot of attention is paid to the moment of insertion and reception. The first weeks, in fact, are very delicate and, often, parents experience this novelty with contrasting emotions. L ' attention to these early stages is very helpful because it accompanies the little ones in a delicate moment, in which children find themselves separated from the family environment, often for the first time. The children, in fact, in this particular moment of life, approach a different reality, often new to them. It is usually thought that after these first few weeks, everything will be fine. In fact, this is usually the case. Once this new world is explored, children will go to kindergarten without any particular crisis. Sometimes, however, the opposite also happens. After a quiet insertion, the child does not want to go to school later in the year. In fact, it may happen that small crises arise at other times, often displacing the parents, who find themselves unprepared.

In fact, late crises are sometimes overlooked. Much more often than you think it happens that children find themselves experiencing feelings of sadness and anger when going to school even at times other than those of the beginning of the year. It is not uncommon, therefore, to be faced with a child who does not want to go to school even later, perhaps alternating quiet moments with moments of greater opposition.

DOES NOT WANT TO GO TO SCHOOL: WHY HAPPENS?

There can be several reasons why a child does not want to go to school during the year.

- THE POST NEWS. After the euphoria of the moment, children often become aware of the fact that this will be everyday life for some time. And this can scare children, who realize that kindergarten is not the exception. The separation from mom and dad, or from other reference figures, therefore, will be daily. The enthusiasm for the new school games, for the teachers and for the wonderful activities that take place in kindergarten, in fact, can give way to melancholy and a momentary sadness.

- AFTER PERIODS OF ABSENCE. After holidays or following a period of illness, for example, returning to kindergarten always becomes very difficult. Returning to everyday life after spending time at home, pampered and free to do what you prefer, is certainly not easy. In fact, it is necessary to take time to resume normal daily rhythms and return to full activity.

DOESN'T WANT TO GO TO SCHOOL: CAN SOMETHING BE WRONG?

Sometimes, faced with the difficulty of a child who does not want to go to school, a moment of complexity can be hidden. Usually these are fleeting moments, which disappear on their own after a few days. However, when a child does not want to go to school and the malaise persists for a long time, it can be useful to investigate the situation. For example, it can happen that crises occur not only at the time of the posting, but also throughout the morning. The child skips lunch and despair persists throughout the day. The little one seems immune from the attempts of consolation on the part of parents and teachers who, thus, find themselves in great difficulty and do not know how to deal with the situation.

Understanding better what is happening and understanding how to cope with it is certainly very useful, for the child and for the people around him who, consequently, suffer from the child's strong anguish.

- IS THERE SOMETHING WRONG IN KINDERGARTEN?

Sometimes children may show resistance to going to kindergarten for something that actually happened. It may be a fight with a partner, which may have frightened the child and caused him to momentarily lose his points of reference. It may be a teacher's rebuke, which the child may have misunderstood as an attack on her. Other times, however, it may be a proposed activity that causes discomfort in the child and which, therefore, leads him to resist when going to kindergarten. It can be useful to learn more about what happened and help the little one deal with this moment. As always, dialogue between the family and educators is fundamental.

This does not mean completely changing the environment in which the little one is inserted so as not to make him feel more unpleasant emotions. It is not by overprotecting children that you help them to grow up in a serene way. On the contrary, it is important to help the little ones to express their moments of discomfort and suffering, so that, together, solutions can be found to cope with them. It is only by helping children to find useful strategies to face the small and big challenges of life that we guarantee the possibility of developing and enhancing resilience.

- ANY CHANGES AT HOME?

It may happen that the discomfort in going to kindergarten arises as a response to a moment of complexity that the child is experiencing. They can be positive or negative news, but which, however, momentarily destabilize the child.

This may be some change in your life, such as the birth of a baby brother or a move. Maybe you don't even change city, but the child temporarily loses the references he has had up to now. It may be the separation of the parents, which leads the child to experience a whole new reality. Sometimes it can be a bereavement that affects the family and, let's not forget, the children too. All this can temporarily destabilize the little one, who is looking for security in wanting to stay in his own house. Faced with a change, in fact, it often happens that children complain of not wanting to go to school. Also in this case it can be useful to understand what worries the child and, together, find the best tools to deal with it.

- SEPARATION ANXIETY?

Sometimes, a real separation anxiety can be hidden behind the fact that a child doesn't want to go to school. It consists of a strong feeling of fear and anguish when the child has to move away from people who are significant to him. It may be useful to observe whether the distress at the time of separation occurs only at the time of going to school, or if it is also present in other contexts. For example, children may refuse to go play with a friend or participate in their favorite sporting activity. If the anxiety seems to be spread to other contexts, therefore, it may be useful to deepen the situation, to understand how to cope with this strong anguish that the child feels when separating.

Source: CPP30411 Certificate III in Security Operations